Things Change

so i have realized that nothing last forever, everything is fleeting. my relationships with people, lives, dreams, hopes...they are all fleeting. yet i never realized this completely until today. today an acquaintance of mine had her mother die, she died at two o’clock pm on the 25th of february. i felt like i had an odd connection to this whole situation, like i was a part of it. which is stupid because i hardly know this girl let alone her mother. yet the entire day i was in a funk, one that nobody could remove me from. maybe it’s a coincidence or maybe it’s just the truth, maybe i am simply empathetic. who knows.

after mrs. rochester, the play that this girl was supposed to star in, opens next week. i feel oddly connected to the whole experience because my best friend is learning the part that the other woman was supposed to play. (the one with the deceased mother) so for the past few days i have been running lines with a very, very distraught friend of mine, hoping that everything will work out, that there will be no death. but here it is, the truth is out, her mother had died and i never knew her, yet i am so connected to her.

god, how i wish that i could forget this whole play and everything that happens within it, its so taxing; both emotionally and generally. i feel like i have internalized the entire play, each character and their quirks. theater makes you crazy, maybe that is why i gave it up so many years ago...who knows--who knows.